Did Angel Leave Buffy for legitimate reasons?

I really don't see any issues with Angel's reasons for breaking it off with Buffy and leaving Sunnydale.
At that moment in time he just felt that way and believe she would be better off without him. It probably would have been easier to stay with Buffy and not put them both through the heartache but he was looking at the bigger picture and truly thought that she could have a as normal and hopefully fulfilling life without him.
Of course it could be look at that he was very wrong in thr end however no one can tell me it wasn't with her best interests at heart.

And if Angel had come to this difficult decision which could be viewed as having some influence from The Mayor and most definitely Joyce, then him going to talk about it with Buffy would have got them no where in the end because they would have been back to square one being together in their very limited relationship and the continuous threat of the curse being broken hanging over their heads and boy what a marvellous way to live?!

Plus this is something that they both have done where one makes the decision and the other has to accept it. Buffy deciding that they couldn't just be friends because she asked Angel that one simple question of hers saying to tell her he doesn't love her. And because he couldn't, Buffy decided to end their fragile friendship because of their deep feelings for one another that she thinks would inevitably have them giving into their passion.

So yeah ideally it would have been better in a sense for Angel to talk out his worries about their relationship in the past, present and future but sometimes when you have that gut feeling that it's not right because of the circumstances surrounding your situation, you just go for what you believe even knowing that it will cause hurt and pain not just for yourself but another person.

And it wasn't just Angel not talking to Buffy about THEIR relationship but also her mother making a decision to go behind her daughter's back and effectively helping to break up a relationship that she ISN'T involve in. I'm more annoyed with how Joyce handle it than Angel because what she did to me, definitely show a lack of respect towards her 18 YEAR OLD Daughter. And Joyce is very lucky to understand that Angel won't ever mention it to Buffy.
 
We all know Joss Whedon's greatest contribution to Angel: Numfar. That's right, Joss himself played the part of Numfar of the Krevlorneswath clan. Do the dance of joy, Numfar!
 
No, he didn't. But it helped the show, otherwise we would have had 5 more years of angst and torture and of "I love you, but I can't be with you." That pesky soul thing always getting in the way.
 
I know that I’m gonna get some heat, but I’ve always felt that Angel leaving was to some extent an act of cowardice. It was like saying “this is too difficult, I rather not keep trying, it’s not worth it and we’ve both suffered enough.” So for me, instead of reading let me “spare YOU pain,” I read it as let me “spare ME pain.”
 
Angel6
Angel6
That’s al coming from you, it’s not written that way at all.
@Angel6 I know, it's a very personal interpretation and I know that's controversial. I can't say more about that.
 
I think Angel left for legitimate reasons
I know that I’m gonna get some heat, but I’ve always felt that Angel leaving was to some extent an act of cowardice. It was like saying “this is too difficult, I rather not keep trying, it’s not worth it and we’ve both suffered enough.” So for me, instead of reading let me “spare YOU pain,” I read it as let me “spare ME pain.”

Mm I don't feel this takes into account the immense guilt both The Mayor and *especially* Joyce placed on him, though. I mean, I know people's mileage varies when it comes to the importance (or lack thereof) of your in-laws approval but, for me, it would be really hard to continue dating Buffy if Joyce disapproved so strongly. Imagine being given Joyce's ultimatum ("I know you care about her. I just hope you care enough") and continuing to date Buffy? I feel people don't emphasise enough the emotional toll that would've taken on Angel. She basically guilt-trips him into leaving as if he didn't, in her eyes, it'd prove he was too selfish to let her go. That's rough.

Ultimately I feel that Angel made the best decision and I think it's eye-opening that once Buffy calmed down she basically admitted as much ("In the long run... I think he's right"). I do think he was being honest in everything he said about why he was leaving even if there were probably other motives in the mix as well. I do think on some level, perhaps unbeknownst to him, he was also seeking a greater purpose/destiny outside of her relationship with Buffy, and that it was easier for both of them if he couched his leaving as strictly being what's best for her. I'm not sure if Angel had come to terms with that himself yet. But I do believe he was totally sincere in everything he said about how he felt the relationship was unfair to her and that it was unsustainable in the long run.
 
Mrs Gordo
Mrs Gordo
Good to see you on these boards! :)
If you love something set it free.

Angel loved Buffy but left to give her a chance at a normal life. As Buffy said, she would never have that, but Angel wanted her to try as much as she could. She'd always be a slayer, and having a difficult relationship with a vampire who can't give her a family & freely walk in & enjoy the daylight, sex, etc. wouldn't be fair to her.

Now it's easy to get frustrated with him because Buffy was willing to try dealing with all that, but again her age comes into play. She says she doesn't care about sex. But she'd only had sex once. And Angel may have felt she hasn't experienced enough of the wonders of life before she starts giving them up for me.

He wanted to be with Buffy, but may have had doubts in the back of his mind. Then when Joyce & the mayor makes their comments, it only enhanced the doubts he had. Even more so with the mayor since he was the Angel in his relationship to his wife. So his words really had merit.

Despite popular belief by some, leaving isn't always the coward's way out. Just because you love someone doesn't mean you are compatible with them.You can't love until it hurts but there are hurdles that can't be overcome. And trying to stay & force compatibility only tends to make people miserable in the long-run.

So I think Angel was mostly selfless in trying to do that for Buffy. She was heartbroken & it hurt her deeply that Angel was leaving her. But that's only normal, and as hard as it is, it would get easier as she continued with her life. And we saw that. Despite being upset about Angel, Buffy didn't go into depression & stop living. She went on with her life & got more relationship & sexual experience.

I will agree putting her with Spike pretty much negated Angel's sacrifice and makes it seem like Buffy really hasn't grown & learned anything. Same with Cangel. We saw the harshness of Bangel and why it wasn't meant to be. Then they pair both characters off with one another's rivals and recreate Banegl with nothing apparently learned. lol Buffy & Angel with Riley & Nina made more sense. But trying to make Spuffy & Cangel the new be & end alls does seem to completely negate Bangel. The only advantage of Cangel is that Cordelia isn't a slayer. It'd be more even to Spuffy if Angel got with Faith. lol
 
I think he left for legitimate reasons because not being able to make Buffy happy was definitely a huge problem in their relationship. It's hard to argue that it came from a selfless place but at the same time… why would you remain in a relationship when it makes you miserable? When you always have to worry about being too happy? I know Angel is a pretty masochist character, but that's just… I don't believe you should be in a relationship when you can't even be happy within it. To me, that's the basic explanation as to why he left. There was no possible happiness there. It was better for both of them in the long run.

That said, Angel has his reasons for leaving (and I completely agree with them) but that doesn't mean that Buffy can't ever date a vampire after him because it personally made it impossible for Angel to be with her. Angel makes his own decisions, so can Buffy. Angel is not the boss of who Buffy dates. If he broke up with Buffy because he thinks she shouldn't date vampires, that's his prerogative. But Buffy doesn't have to respect his wishes, she has her own agency.
 
If you love something set it free.

Angel loved Buffy but left to give her a chance at a normal life. As Buffy said, she would never have that, but Angel wanted her to try as much as she could. She'd always be a slayer, and having a difficult relationship with a vampire who can't give her a family & freely walk in & enjoy the daylight, sex, etc. wouldn't be fair to her.

Now it's easy to get frustrated with him because Buffy was willing to try dealing with all that, but again her age comes into play. She says she doesn't care about sex. But she'd only had sex once. And Angel may have felt she hasn't experienced enough of the wonders of life before she starts giving them up for me.

He wanted to be with Buffy, but may have had doubts in the back of his mind. Then when Joyce & the mayor makes their comments, it only enhanced the doubts he had. Even more so with the mayor since he was the Angel in his relationship to his wife. So his words really had merit.

Despite popular belief by some, leaving isn't always the coward's way out. Just because you love someone doesn't mean you are compatible with them.You can't love until it hurts but there are hurdles that can't be overcome. And trying to stay & force compatibility only tends to make people miserable in the long-run.

So I think Angel was mostly selfless in trying to do that for Buffy. She was heartbroken & it hurt her deeply that Angel was leaving her. But that's only normal, and as hard as it is, it would get easier as she continued with her life. And we saw that. Despite being upset about Angel, Buffy didn't go into depression & stop living. She went on with her life & got more relationship & sexual experience.

I will agree putting her with Spike pretty much negated Angel's sacrifice and makes it seem like Buffy really hasn't grown & learned anything. Same with Cangel. We saw the harshness of Bangel and why it wasn't meant to be. Then they pair both characters off with one another's rivals and recreate Banegl with nothing apparently learned. lol Buffy & Angel with Riley & Nina made more sense. But trying to make Spuffy & Cangel the new be & end alls does seem to completely negate Bangel. The only advantage of Cangel is that Cordelia isn't a slayer. It'd be more even to Spuffy if Angel got with Faith. lol
You see I disagree that putting her with Spike negated Angel's sacrifice because she doesn't have worry about him losing his soul. You can see that they don't work out for similar reasons if you want to believe they don't get back together - nothing contradicts you either way but at least they were able to explore without having to worry if the sky was going to fall if they got too close. Also to quote Passion of the Nerd a thing is not beautiful because it lasts.

Angel6

You need to specify when you are talking of it still doesn't negate Angel's decision to leave as she says in Forever she's really needy. Angel around her then wouldn't have gone well.
 
Angel6
Angel6
She still can’t have a normal life with Spike to any extent, and her relationship wasn’t even with Spike with a soul! It was exclusively with Unsouled Spike.
there is a simple explanation why he left.
1. they wanted a spin off to deepen the buffyverse. wheadon did that later, when he made river essentially a slayer.
2. he had to leave so Buffy could rebound w Riley, which lead to spike in the long run.
3. they ran out of things to do with him in that context
 
there is a simple explanation why he left.
1. they wanted a spin off to deepen the buffyverse. wheadon did that later, when he made river essentially a slayer.
2. he had to leave so Buffy could rebound w Riley, which lead to spike in the long run.
3. they ran out of things to do with him in that context
River...a Slayer? Ummmm, I don't think so lol.
 
she totally is!
she actually uses Buffy's ultimate slayer weapon from season 7 in the comics.
She has enhanced strength, fighting skills, prophecy, she can sense reavers, and is very smart. oh and she draws people to her. all the signs of a slayer.
 
@walkthruthefire,
should you read through my fan-fics you'll discover one that states of River being a slayer. Shame I can't remember which one as reading them all will take ages as there are so many.
 
Back
Top Bottom