Spike or Angel - Who would be a better husband for Buffy?

[BuffMarsters]

I’m kind of on the fence about this because I have mixed feelings about both Angel and Spike.

I feel like there’s a difference between having chemistry with someone, and them being well matched for you in terms of personality, behaviour and the way they interact with you. Now having said that, as an individual, I find Spike more interesting than Angel. I don’t hate Angel or anything. He’s just a bit too stoic and serious for my liking. But just because I like Spike more as a singleton, doesn’t mean that I like him when he’s with Buffy.

I thought that Spike and Buffy definitely had some romantic potential. They had a mild bit of heat and chemistry going in the early seasons. It was a spark that I could see turning into a flame. But the way there relationship played out was a huge disappoint me (Kinda like how I feel about Elena and Damon in TVD). Buffy brought out the good in Spike, but being with Spike turned Buffy into a whole new person. To be honest, I don’t even know if Buffy ‘felt’ like Buffy anymore. It’s like she became this whole other person.

Now Angel on the other hand. When Buffy was with him him, she always seemed like the Buffy I know and love. And even though I find Angel boring, I feel like Angel and Buffy were well suited for each other. They didn’t have a ton of chemistry, but it felt like they were a good team and that they balanced each other out. I imagine that if Angel and Buffy had got married, they would have lasted for a lifetime. angel would have been a good husband and a good father (as long as that pesky Angelus thing didn’t get in the way, obviously). Now if Spike and Buffy got married, I imagine they would have ended up having a messy and lengthy divorce (and a fierce custody battle if kids were involved).

Of course, some of you might disagree with me. I know Spike fans are a pretty vocal bunch. This is the video I watched, which got me thinking about the topic (it’s pro spike, in case you were wondering).

 

[Bop]

What sort of showdown was that they literally didn't say one nice thing about Angel or Bangel. Total clickbait. I quit watching when they said that by season 4 Buffy wasn't good enough for Spike. That's delusional! They're entitled to their opinion but you can't call it a showdown if all you're going to do is praise one side and hate on the other.

 

[flow]

I choose an "and" instead of an "or" and thus voted for "Others". Inspired by this beautiful Video by Double Dutchess, that was posted by @TriBel on the Back Steps. I am taking the freedom of reposting it here.

The Angel vs Spike Video is just an Angel bashing video. It`s quite boring Imho.

flow

 

[Mrs Gordo]

I've seen a few videos from these girls on top of the fact that I can't stand how they talk they don't particularly seem to like Buffy (they prefer Faith) and apparently they don't like Angel so why the F are you watching these shows? Its utterly ridiculous.

I picked Angel. Because you should marry the love of your life.

 

[DeadlyDuo]

I think Buffy and Angel are more likely to be married. Not only do they still love each other and will do until the day they both die, but Spike doesn't seem like the kind to bother with marriage. If he loves a girl, he will be with her though it all, he doesn't need a fancy bit of paper telling him that he's officially with a woman. He was with Dru for over 100 years and not being married didn't bother either of them (probably because they enjoyed "living in sin" since marriage would've been a big thing when they were human).

 

[Mrs Gordo]

They didn’t have a ton of chemistry,

Also, Oh boy do I disagree with this. From beginning to end I thought they sizzled!

 

[Puppet]

Also, Oh boy do I disagree with this. From beginning to end I thought they sizzled!

And yet where you see heat, I see awkwardness, so I agree with the OP on that part, but am also aware that it's different for everyone. Perhaps part of why I could never see Bangel as a good thing (not even on my first watch) was because I didn't feel any true chemistry between them.

That being said, I voted other; Spike is , imo, not the marriying sort, however I've yet to read past S8 of the comics 🙂

 

[Priceless]

I believe Angel loves that 17 year old girl and he doesn't know the woman Buffy has become. Angel was Buffy's first love and she will always love him, but as a woman she is in love with Spike and he's in love with her. If she were to marry anyone it will be Spike.

 

[WillowFromBuffy]

God. Why can't those two just marry Faith and James Marstewrs? Get a room.

I voted Riley. Riley has potential. Angel and Spike are both damaged goods. They would be great fathers in their way, but they are both limited and obsessive. It would be risky. They certainly have a whole load of issues for their potential children to inherit.

One question: Why is Angel's idea of being a father so modern and American? Did he watch a lot of Full House in the bat cave?

 

[TriBel]

Buffy brought out the good in Spike, but being with Spike turned Buffy into a whole new person. To be honest, I don’t even know if Buffy ‘felt’ like Buffy anymore. It’s like she became this whole other person.

True - but that wasn't down to Spike - at least not directly. Buffy came to realise that her life as a slayer was oppressive and dehumanized her. Moreover, that her oppression was rooted in patriarchal oppression. It was those shackles she threw off in 7 - she changed what it meant to be a Slayer and this enabled the real Buffy to emerge. As a result of re-visioning her life, she was free to admit what she couldn't admit before - she loved Spike. Watch S7 again - and I mean watch - not listen. The season doesn't tell their love - it shows it. In S8 she's still drawn to him but as her "dark place". In 9 he refuses to wear this mantle and leaves. In 10 she bids farewell to Angel. She'll always love him but that's in the past - Spike's her future. Yes she changes - don't we all? Spike also changes. S 10 is about them adapting to each other. In 11 they've both evolved - they're lovers and partners and best friends. Can't ask for much more. As for marriage...meh. If they want it...I don't think they need it. They're not conventional (in the fullest sense of the term) - that's their strength.

 

[Antho]

Oh I really don't like the first video in the first comment. Typical debate I'm tired of and typical fans I don't want to discuss with !

 

[WillowFromBuffy]

Wait. What am I saying? Buffy should give up on marriage and become Willow's platonic life partner. That way, they would have the support of a stable relationship while both dated a serious of interesting people and vamps.

 

[Mrs Gordo]

And yet where you see heat, I see awkwardness,

I understand....how long had you had problems with your vision? Lol. 😛 Jk...I get it. Different folks, different strokes.

 

[BuffyBot22]

Well this is difficult considering Buffy is human and the majority of options on this list are vampires.

If Angel could become human through the Shanshu, Mohra demon's blood, or some other way, he is the obvious choice. He is a far more stable companion and IMO who Buffy is truly in love. She said "when I look into the future, all I see is you." Then in s7 when she gave her cookie speech she said that she sometimes does look that far ahead implying that Angel was still her future but she needed some time right now to become whoever she is gonna be.

But, since Angel is a vampire and Riley is a douche who already has a wife, I suppose to only logical answer is other. But I don't see that going so well either, unless he does have some sort of military training in order to fight along her side.

Anyways I voted for Angel because it's what I want and what I believe Buffy wants.

 

[white avenger]

I'll take "Other."

Let's review the candidates:

Riley- I can't see Buffy as Mrs Corn Fed Iowa Boy, just out of general principal. Buffy ain't no farm girl.

Angel-First, vampire. Immortal, creature of the night, ant that soul issue that just doesn't seem surmountable. Boyfriend, maybe, but no "all the way" fun.

Spike- Again, vampire. Immortal and creature of the night, but with a soul permanently attached. Boyfriend and lover, okay. Lotsa fun for everyone.

And now, "Others"

Liam- Human. Mortal, probably a nice guy, but with daddy issues, needs to get past all the drinking and wenching. Most likely not much of an intellectual, and no known professional training of any kind. Good sketch artist. Boyfriend and lover, okay. Husband, provider, bread winner? Questionable, but possible. Good father.

William- Human. Mortal, intellectual, something of a mama's boy, but honest and sincere. Probably hard working, but not very self assertive. Introverted, aspiring poet. Shy. A one girl guy. Husband, provider, bread winner? Most likely. Good father? Probably.

Randy- Everything a girl could want in a woman. Kind, brave, loyal, loving, and all around snappy dresser.

Buffy's perfect husband: Randy.

(But she's gonna have to change her name to Joan to make it perfect)

 

[GoSpuffy]

I always felt Buffy loved Angel more than he loved her. Spike loves Buffy more than anything. Buffy's the star and I want her to be happy and that means the complete love and adoration she can only get from Spike.

 

[Angel6]

I always felt Buffy loved Angel more than he loved her. Spike loves Buffy more than anything. Buffy's the star and I want her to be happy and that means the complete love and adoration she can only get from Spike.

Totally disagree, Angel loves Buffy more than anything. He puts her happiness ahead of his own again and again-which is real love. Spike wants Buffy like a possession.

 

[CHK DeWilSon]

I voted for Angel. Because I just love the character but also believe that if there was a way for it to be Angel with no major consequences then Buffy would pick him above anyone else.

However out of the rest of the choices it could have also been Riley if I felt Buffy wanted him and then my final vote would be other for someone completely new for her although Buffy does come with A LOT of baggage!

 

[thetopher]

Best husband? Angel, clearly. We see Angel can act happily domestic when it suits him. He can cook, he does laundry, he's a dab hand at decorating and DIY, he's a good Dad. He seems to have some of those life skills that Buffy would value in a hubby. The vampire thing is the one factor getting in the way.

Neither Riley or Spike seemed capable of being Buffy's equal, so they wouldn't end up being be good husbands.

 

[gwenogjones]

I think Buffy should marry Oz. I love that scene when he goes on patrol with her: 'nobody deserves mime, Buffy.' They don't get a lot of screen time together but the moments they do get are always great to watch.
I like to think that she grew up a bit more, spent some time by herself; travelled the world, slaying as she went and bumped into Oz somewhere off the beaten track. They hung out - probably got attacked by a demon - and things just sort of went from there. They would be awesome together - they can both never be completely normal but have found ways that they can almost have normalcy (her through calling other the slayers, him through being able to keep his inner cool at the full moon.) They're both connected to the mystical world but would also support each other in exploring the normal world - they both like to travel; I feel that Oz would be very supportive in getting Buffy to experiment with the more out there types of cheese that the world has to offer and he would accompany her to the icecapades (it is him that says the icecapades are not dumb - ice is cool, it's like water - but it's not) and obviously she would be happy to go to gigs with him. He could help her with researching demons (he's practically a genius), whilst she would go out and kill them and he would be safe in the knowledge that - if he ever wolfed out unexpectedly - he is with someone who can contain him and stop him from hurting anybody.
He is completely accepting of the fact that she is the slayer, that she is stronger than him and always will be, and she is completely OK with the fact that he is a werewolf. He passes the test of having enough monster in him to hold Buffy's attention - without actually having any darkness to drag her down. His utterly laid back attitude would help her relax from the crazy amount of pressure and sense of duty she holds herself to; whilst her drive and can do attitude would influence him into being a bit more proactive and actually making use of the masses of potential his crazy intellect gives him.
Plus - they are both mortal - so they can do the whole growing old together thing - which is a pretty important factor in the decision to get married.

It's not a crazy, passionate, melodramatic relationship like she has with the vampires ... but it's happy and fun and adventurous and stable, with lots of emotional support and room to grow as people and explore new things.