Incorrect Quotes

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Lilah: Go ahead - tell me what you really think of me.
Gavin: You're a cold-hearted, soul-sucking mega-bitch who effects everything around her like a parasitic virus that eats away a man's flesh.
Lilah: Aw, stop - i'm gonna' blush...

Next: Daniel Holtz
 
Daniel Holtz: *bites lip* Has anyone ever told you how beautiful you are?
Cop: That isn’t gonna work, hands behind your back.

Next: Knox
 
Knox: Oh great Illyria, I have studied the ancient texts in order to bring you back. I have performed the ancient rituals. I am your Kwa zin...
Knox: Qwahaha zagan?
Knox: Kiwi Zin?
Illyria: Qwa'ha Xahn *rips Knox's head off*
Illyria: If you can't pronounce the title, you don't deserve it.

Next: Dawn
 
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Oz: I've considered a new nickname in the past, cos of all the 'Wizard of Oz' jokes. But at the same time, I think that they're pretty cool. Which is why in the end, decided to keep it. And also, TeenWolf was taken.


Next: Angelus & Darla
 
Angelus and Darla: Do you even, cuddle, bro? Do you even lift, bro… each other up with kindness? Do you tell your loved ones that you care about them regardless of who is listening? DO YOU EVER RESOLVE CONFLICTS, EMOTIONAL ISSUES THROUGH COMPROMISE AND COMPASSION RATHER THAN ANGER AND DENIAL?!

Next: Drusilla
 
Drusilla: Look how pretty I am in the mirror.
Spike: Firstly, Dru, you're a vampire and we don't cast reflections.
Dru: But I see myself, my hair all shiny and lovely and radiant.
Spike: Secondly, that's not a mirror. It's a painting. Of a horse.

Next: Buffy
 
Buffy: Jeez, I'm so glad that I sacrificed myself in your place so that you could flooze it up and dirty dance with boys.
Dawn: And if I knew you were going to 'mom lecture' me on doing so, I would have jumped. Infact, next time, I will.
Buffy: Go ahead. Just don't do it in that outfit you're wearing.


Next: Ben
 
Ben: I have this ...other side that comes out.. I can't control it; it's like she- I mean, it...takes me over. *changes into Glory*
Glory: Don't forget that Benjamin. I may be in heels, but I wear the pants in this relationship.

Next: Joyce
 
Jenny: I've been waiting for ages for help on this helpline.
Operator: Your call is important to us.
Jenny: It doesn't feel like it.
Operator: I'm sorry, but we're now closed for the day. Goodbye.
Jenny: Don't cut me off! Don't cut me off!
*dial tone*
Jenny: A good witch would not be upset by this. A good witch would take it in her stride. A good witch would not curse them.
Jenny: ...
Jenny: Screw being a good witch.

Next: The Mayor
 
Cassie: I've predicted that next friday I'm going to die. But bright side is, the following week, I win the lottery!


Next: Billy Fordham
 
Billy: Of course I love you, Buffy. When have the men in your life that you've loved betrayed you?
Buffy: How long do you have for me to go through the list?

Next: Adam
 
Adam: I have upgraded your laptop.
Lackey: Great. Thanks.
Adam: I am curious. You have many files labelled 'hot and wet'. Is that a part of some sort of evil scheme?
Lackey: That's none of your business. *snatches laptop* I'll be in my lair.


Next: Glory and Dreg
 
Glory and Dreg: You can de-escalate literally any situation by asking ‘are we about to kiss?’
Glory and Dreg: Doesn't work with getting out of speeding tickets, though.

Next: The Master
 
The Master: I will fill my lair with deadly traps so trap enthusiasts will come visit me. I get lonely.

Next: Wishverse Buffy
 
Spike: I may have a chip in my brain and can't hurt humans, but I'm still bad. Yesterday, an old lady asked me to help her cross the road, and I just walked across and left her there.
Buffy: Ookay. But why do you have boils all over your face?
Spike: Turned out she was a bloody gypsy.


Next: Gunn
 
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